People Pleaser

I loathe the title of this post. Absolutely hate it. But it fits. And if it fits it ships. Or sticks. Or... I have got to stop writing on this blog after 10pm. That's about two hours after my brain shuts off. 

What was I saying? Ugh. People pleaser. Such a yucky connotation. Maybe I hate it so much because I hate cliches. Maybe I just don't like the use of alliterations. Maybe it just brings up too much hurt from never being able to please people like I thought I should be able to. 

Ding ding ding ding ding!!

There is a beautiful song that's been out for like, ever. Written by Chris Tomlin it is one of my favorite worship songs... "We fall down, we lay our crowns, at the feet of Jesus."

And there we are with feet again. But there's something meaningful about noticing the often neglected members. There's something powerful about laying down your pride and just sitting at the feet of Jesus. There's power at sitting at other people's feet, too.

Then Mary took a twelve-ounce jar of expensive perfume made from essence of nard, and she anointed Jesus’ feet with it, wiping his feet with her hair. The house was filled with the fragrance.

John 12:3

Y'all, this picture just breaks me. 

Dudes, homeslice poured out the best perfume and anointed the feet of Jesus with it. She laid down her pride, her money, her stature: all at the feet of Jesus. And from her doing that the house was filled with what I imagine to be a beautiful fragrance. I picture her lavishing it on his feet and wiping the excess off with her hair; not caring if her hair got dirty or not. Who cares about dirt when you've got Jesus right there; allowing you to touch his feet. There's something intimate and beautiful and just gripping about it. And the whole house could smell what happened. They could catch a glimpse of her offering. 

“That perfume was worth a year’s wages. It should have been sold and the money given to the poor.” Not that he cared for the poor—he was a thief, and since he was in charge of the disciples’ money, he often stole some for himself.

John 12:4, 5

Oh, Judas. How can you not see? Jesus is worth more than money. And how do you not remember how he fed five thousand with two fishes and a loaf of bread? Why don't you just enjoy this moment? Where did you go off track? More importantly; why don't you ask for help to get back on track? I hate it for Mary: she gets ridiculed by one of the disciples (who, for the record, was a thief and betrayer) and called out for not using her money for what he considered to be a greater good. Like there's anything greater than worshiping God. Psssh. Bottom line: Judas wanted Mary to fit into a box she just flat out refused to be closed up in. And FYI: Jesus didn't make her go into that box, either. 

As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught.

Luke 10:38, 39

I love that Mary. I so long to just sit at the feet of Jesus, listening to him speak, soaking in everything I can while in his presence. I close my eyes and imagine what it would be like to just sit with him, and to sit close to him. To hear secrets and catch his facial expressions when he said certain phrases. To pick up on his humor and the meanings behind his parables. To hear what others won't hear because they're too busy to hear what is being whispered. Mary got to sit at his feet. Hear the tone and inflection of his voice. Y'all, we can have that, too. If we'll sit and just listen. Hushhh...

 But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.”

But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her."

Luke 10:40-42

When you want to complain think of this: who is my complaint really with?

And there we have Heidi. I mean Martha! Precious Martha. So busy making sure everyone's cup is full and bellies are satisfied. So busy working to make sure everyone else is comfortable and satiated. Just working so hard for everyone else to be (what's that word again? oh yeah) pleased. So, she did what any good sister would do and tattled on her sister. Like Jesus didn't know where Mary was. I honestly do not know if Martha was a younger sibling but she sure tattled like one. I should know: I'm a baby sister. And an expert tattler. I will tell on you in a heartbeat. At the very least I'll tell God. So I totally get Martha. I work so hard in my home and job to make sure things are taken care of; to make sure no one has to ask for a document or dinner or clean shirt or an email... That I forget the people I'm serving. And I never measure up against the unrealistic standard I set. I'm so busy serving I forget the reason why I'm serving or if there is a more effective way to serve the individual. Martha was so busy serving Jesus she forgot to ask him how to best serve him. She didn't take the time to listen. Yeah. Sounds like me sometimes. 

 Jesus knew that the Father had given him authority over everything and that he had come from God and would return to God. So he got up from the table, took off his robe, wrapped a towel around his waist, and poured water into a basin. Then he began to wash the disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel he had around him.

John 13:3-5

Jesus knew who he was, whose he was, where he came from, and where he was headed. (That could teach an impactful lesson in itself.) So knowing he had authority over everything he delegated feet washing to someone else. What? That wasn't what he did? But isn't that what the big shots do? Not this man. No, not the Son of God. He took off his robe (which was also symbolic) and washed his disciples' feet and used the towel he had wrapped around him to dry them off. Y'all, this towel was literally on his body, close to his skin. And he dried off their feet he had washed with what was essentially his shirt. Their feet skin cells close to his belly's skin. And yet he was still misunderstood: Peter didn't think his Lord should get dirty. Jesus knows who he is. And Jesus ain't afraid of your dirt. Jesus is not afraid to get dirty and do work. Neither should we be afraid to do work, get dirty, and just be real with people. He is not afraid of sin. He is not afraid of rejection. He is not intimidated. Because he just wants to love you. He just wants to sit at your feet, and listen, and wipe away the yuck that gets trapped in your toes. Rub away the callouses that you think are protection but are really crippling the way you walk. Jesus is real. You can be real, too.

In the beginning of my journey with Jesus my Other told me that because Jesus lives, I can live. Take it a step further: because Jesus is real, I can be real. Because he is not intimidated by other people's criticism or gossip or misunderstanding, I don't have to be intimidated. Jesus didn't come to this earth as a sacrifice to make you happy or please any of us. Nope. He did it to save us from a life that will cripple, destroy, and kill us. He did it so that we could walk and live free.

Recap: Mary who rubbed her perfume on the feet of Jesus was criticized and condemned by a disciple (who should have known better). Mary, Martha's sister, was tattled on. Jesus, the Savior of the world, was misunderstood. But it didn't stop them from getting close. It didn't stop them from pleasing God. And that is the heart of it all: please God. You want to please God? Love his people. Not just the people that attend your church or believe the same way as you or tolerate you because you're related. But love those people you disagree with. Love those people who get boycotted and picketed against. (Newsflash: you don't love them by boycotting them or picketing against them. But that's for another post that may never come to fruition.) Love them even when they misunderstand. Love them even when they criticize. Love them though they tattle and gossip about you. Love them because you love Jesus. Don't be afraid of their feet. Don't be afraid of their dirt. Jesus is bigger and cleaner and softer than any of the nastiest feet out there. Be brave today: sit at the feet of Jesus, let him sit at yours. And then go sit at someone else's feet.

Feet Last or Feet First?

Hello Blog, my name is Heidi. 

Me and the mini. Ain't she purdy?

Now that we have been reacquainted let me bare my soul. Okay.. maybe nothing quite that dramatic. Maybe just a glimmer.

A few months ago God dropped a word into my spirit. For those who don't speak Christianese: for me that means I read a passage in the Bible and for the first time the words struck me and I understood them. Some divine revelation that has probably been had by gazillions of people much smarter than me long ago. And it was about something that those in my generation don't tend to love.

Feet. Not just feet; but feet washing. The only time I find feet washing acceptable is when I pay someone who will gossip about me in a different language is sloughing off years of yuck from my heels. (Dudes, I'm pretty gross for a diva let alone a lady or scholar.) Or when you wash your own feet. Other than that: eww, feet!

Awhile back I had the privilege of attending a ladies conference through the church I used to attend. The best part was I got to bring my girl. Man, did that do a number on my heart. Heart. was. melted. I was honored to have my mini with me and watch her glean from what we were doing. It was a FANTASTIC conference. Florida Church of God of Prophecy's Women's Director knows how to listen to God and follow through on her vision and purpose. I could talk about her for years: she's my other (other-mother). We did a variety of things that were unusual yet laid the foundation to a more intimate relationship with Jesus. I kept telling God that there was no way the mini would understand but I still asked for Him to help her take what she could and learn from it: learn how to draw closer to Jesus. 

Then we had the feet washing. (Really, other? Feet washing?) Provided for us for the feet washing were the traditional basins filled with water and the newer method of baby wipes. How cool is that: baby wipes for feet washing. Can baby wipes be holy? If a tub of water can be used for something considered sacred then why not a baby wipe, amiright? (Yes, I am. Ha!) So, because I'm an obedient girl I went to the altar and got some baby wipes for me and the mini diva. And I washed her feet and prayed for her, her walk, and her heart.. Then the tender moment came when my girl washed my feet. And prayed for me. Dudes, I'm crying over here. It was beautiful. And you know how I said I kept telling the Lord there was no way for her to understand all we were doing? She sho' nuff understood better than I gave her credit for. Maybe better than a lot of us that are much older and should understand better than a four year old. The proof: I heard her praying at another portion of the service and telling God that she just wanted to make Him happy. Not me or daddy or grandma; but to make God happy. Oh, for the love. That moment changed the way I pray. 

Anyways. I came home from the conference, told some people about how powerful it was... and then I kinda forgot some of the meat of it. Until I came upon the passage about Jesus washing the feet of the disciples. 

Peter saith unto him, Lord, dost thou wash my feet? Jesus answered and said unto him, What I do thou knowest not now; but thou shalt know hereafter. Peter saith unto him, Thou shalt never wash my feet. Jesus asnwered him, If I wash thee not, thou hast no part with me. Simon Peter saith unto him, Lord, not my feet only, but also my hands and my head. Jesus saith to him, He that is washed needeth not save to wash his feet, but is clean every whit: and ye are clean, but not all. . . If I then, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet; ye also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you.

John 13:6-10, 14, 15

Jesus washed the feet of the disciples. Jesus provided an example of how to serve your friends and family. But why the feet? Why don't I wash their hair or hands? Why their feet? What if they're gross? What if they walk in poop? What if they have corns? 

But, just like we are to forgive people no matter how gross their sin may be, we are also to be an example in serving by washing feet. Let me share why I believe the feet are an important part to wash and notice:

You oughtta be guarding your hands, mouths, eyes, and body in general from being dirty or you should be washing as they get dirty. But your feet can wait until the end of the day: even til after supper. Do you keep your mentionables clean throughout the day? Or do you squish your hands in mud then wipe them on your face and hair? Are you keeping your whole self clean except your feet?

Take it a little deeper. Where have you been walking? I'm talking spiritually and emotionally here: what have you been walking in and through? What kind of territory have you been having to tread or choosing to wander on? Are you smooth sailing for now? What about your friends: where are they walking? What are they dealing with? Maybe from the appearance of our face and hands we're doing well: working hard, smiling, just rolling with the punches... but our feet tell the rest of the story. They tell how tough the road has been. They tell how badly the verbal jabs and forgetfulness of others hurt. They tell how badly the mistakes of others can disturb our peace. (In the armor of God our feet are shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace-see Ephesians 6:11-18.) 

So when we take the time to look a little deeper than just the mentionables but also to the bottom of the story, to the feet of the person, we can see the bigger picture. We can take note of the blisters they're walking on. Wash each other's feet. Take the time to notice what's underneath the smiles or tears. Take the time to really connect with them. Serve them by loving on the parts that may be neglected. Apply some salve to their aches, wash away some muck: comfort those feet! Dry them, warm them. Serve them by doing what they probably won't. Ask the questions to which others don't want to know the answers. Do what others won't.

One last thought: there's a reason people pay to get their feet done. It takes time and elbow grease to get them soft and smooth: something we often aren't willing to do ourselves even if it is for ourselves. So we go to the expert. A stranger. There's just a little too much shame to let our friends give us a pedicure: we'd rather have a stranger do it. Maybe that's the same reason we won't own up to what's hurting us until we're about to explode: too much time and work and maybe even embarrassment at admitting what's eating at us, leaving us achy and calloused. Maybe we're too embarrassed to show our part in the neglect of our own well-being. 

There's so much more that I can say along with what's already been written; but I will end with this: be a friend. Notice the callouses. Pay attention to where and how your friends are walking. And if need be, bust out the baby wipes and literally wash their feet while you pray for their steps.