Dudes, I'm about to put my heart out here. Not that my other posts aren't revealing.. but this is something I normally carry so close I don't let anyone in except my closest friends. With that being said..

My brother sent me a Facebook message last night. My brother who I have adored since I can remember sent me a message and you would have thought that Donnie Wahlberg had just admitted that the classic NKOTB song "Cover Girl" was really about me. You'd have to know back story that I am not willing to get into to fully understand why we don't talk as much as I'd like (every day-us stay at home moms have got time to spare); but that's not important right now. What is important is that he reminded me of some stories tonight from when we were younger.

My brother once convinced me to give him my ratty old paper money in exchange for shiny copper coins. After all, the value of money is determined by its shininess, right?

My brother once took me to a music store where he promised to buy me a Madonna tape.. then talked me down to just getting the single.. then talked me down to getting a button. I left that store with a Madonna button. I had to sing "Cherish" from memory and acapella. It was fabulous.

My brother once let me sleep in and did all of my chores for me. When our mother got home and he ratted on me she gave him all of my allowance money. That extra few hours of sleep was expensive, eh?

My brother once took me to the mall where our grandparents lived and bought me a jewelry box. It was turquoise and had a teddy bear that spun around and played music when you opened the box. He paid extra to have my name painted on it. From the same store he also bought me a tiny pink gumball machine with the same teddy bear as the jewelry box; he paid extra for my name to be painted on that, too.

He took me to Wet 'n' Wild and taught me that I should stay single and celibate (because men are pigs, women are worse, and nuns get pregnant).

I'm reminded of Romans 8:28: ". . . all things work together for the good. . ." There's more to the verse than that and I encourage you to read it. But I'm not getting into that tonight. All of these memories worked together for good: those things that once brought pain or embarrassment worked together with those things that brought joy and giggles. We once watched a horror movie together (I had been told to go to sleep... I didn't) and it scared me so badly that I couldn't fall asleep; so my big brother put on a funny movie to help me sleep and he may have even stayed up with me.. I get fuzzy on that part. That scary movie was overcome by something good and funny (I think it was a John Candy movie. Why do I remember the most inane things?). Those things that were once not so good pale in comparison and even work to make the good memories that much sweeter. I love how life was intended to work that way: for good and not evil, for us to have courage and happiness over fear and depression.

If you read this, big brother, I love you and I'm proud that you're mine.

Ahh.. it's been a few days since I've had a good idea, or any idea, for what to write on here. So, I've decided to list some practical advice from my life lessons. 

1) Do not leave the lid from your ice cream on the kitchen counter where your child can reach. The child will find the lid, lick it, then show you expecting for you to be proud. (For the record, I was.) So, now you know not to eat the ice cream from my house because the lid has already been licked clean and let's be honest, I eat straight from the carton.

2) Invest in a quality razor. If you can obtain a pack of five razors for less than $0.80 a pack, there's a reason for it. You will more than likely leave the shower with dots of blood all over your legs and the agony of razor burn/nicks will last for days. 

3) If you are a task oriented person, having kids will drive you nuts. Kids are task oriented, too, but their tasks are geared towards undoing and undermining any task you wish to accomplish. They laugh in the face of your to-do list!

4) You may have lost all of your baby weight and then some; but if you haven't been exercising you may want to ease into Spinning. They frown upon you falling off the bike to curl in the fetal position bemoaning the loss of feeling in the lower half of your body. (Okay, so I didn't really do that. But I wanted to.) Also, you will be unable to move for the eight hours following the exercise class. Today I tried Zumba. I was not the prodigy I thought I would be and they did not offer me a job teaching on the spot. (Yes, I did daydream that I would be a uniquely agile and talented Zumba dancer. And that they would pay me to teach the lesser beings. It was very humbling to realize I'm one of the lesser beings.)

I had more.. but I forgot them and of course, I neglected to jot them down as I came across these bits of wisdom I gather on a daily basis. Hopefully I will remember and share them with you.. But to be honest, I will probably just learn something else new to share. Ha!

The lot is cast into the lap..

William was having a tender moment with Jetta today. It went something like this:
William: Did you know you are a gift from God? A special gift.
Jetta: Excuse me.
William: Why, did you poot?
Jetta: Yeah.

Isn't that just like a kid; you try to have a heartfelt conversation and they poot on your efforts. Or, you try to discipline them and are angry, then they turn around and give you the same glare or roll of the eyes that you once gave your parents and they break the hard moment. I love my kids; they completely turned my life upside down but they make me and my life better and richer. Which brings me to my first line. It's from Proverbs 16:33. "The lot is cast into the lap, but the whole disposing thereof is the Lord." There is no way of knowing before you have children how your life will be turned upside down and inside out; but God knows the beginning from the end. It's not just with kids; it's also with work, friends, school, church, or marriage. We have ideas of how things will happen, but with the lot is finally thrown into our laps it's usually a whole 'nother ball game. The lot that is in your lap was dispositioned by the Lord; it went through His hands before it came to you. These children that were thrown into my lap were placed there by God and entrusted to me. These children that were the catalyst  for me leaving a lucrative career to stay home and wipe butts without a thank you or paycheck, these children that are the reason I am solely a clearance rack coupon stacking girl instead of a throw it in the cart shopper, these children that make me laugh when I really want to be annoyed; they are my lot. And I'm thankful for the lot. I'm thankful that no matter how difficult the task before me I have the hands and ears of God willing to lead and teach me; His arms to hold me when it's rough going; and He causes His face to shine on me when I'm weary. Life is not perfect, it is not the way I thought it would or should be, there are things that just absolutely stink which I have no control over, and I am typing this in the midst of some struggles; but I'm thankful for the life I have and wouldn't want to trade it for anyone else's. Even when the kids poot while their daddy is trying to boost their self esteem. Especially when they poot.

Jetta and I were folding towels a few days ago; and she is my designated wash cloth folder. After folding nearly all of her share she decided to just lie down. I told her there were only two more left and for her to get up and finish them, then take a break. Her response? "I just need to rest for a little while."

How often have I done that to my mother, pastor/leader (ouch!), husband, children, and worst of all, God. Maybe not that often, but often enough to be convicted. Proverbs 31:13 identifies an important quality of a virtuous woman: she works willingly with her hands. When she's working, she is doing it willingly, readily, gladly, and is inclined to her work. Proverbs 31:18 says that her candle doesn't go out by night. This doesn't mean the woman never sleeps (could any mortal be virtuous after never sleeping?) but it means that she is ready, willing, and inclined to work or do when needed/required (sick kid/family, unctioned to pray/read, etc). This working willingly thing is hard for me; I like working, I like being busy, I like doing things... when I want to. But that is not what willingly means. It means I do it as I am doing my work unto the Lord; whether it's feeding an infant or a homeless man, cleaning diapers or a customer's bank account, vaccuuming a cathedral or cleaning a toilet... willingly, without griping/grumbling. The work that our hands have been called to do is to be done willingly, readily, and completely. Don't lay down before the work is completed; don't faint when you are still at the start line. Let's be brave enough to be called virtuous, excelling over those who only do virtuously yet lack the actual quality of being virtuous.